I don’t know what to say exactly.

This is the second last episode on my list before the reunion episodes, and it seems like all the show-writers were eating glue. Maybe Dean joined the staff?

There needed to be some reason for Luke and Lorelai to break up, so all of a sudden Luke has a secret daughter. When he finds out about April Luke decides that he ought to play a bigger role in her life.

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He is surly and doesn’t appear to give a damn about most people other than the Gilmore Girls, and his Family. Luke is fiercely loyal to his family, and sees it as his duty to look after them when they need help, even if he doesn’t want to. His relationship with Jess is a prime example. Did Luke want to have Jess move in? Absolutely not. Did Luke hesitate to allow Jess to move in? Absolutely Not.

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That’s Luke! And so it makes so much sense that Luke would want to be a father to his secret daughter.

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April

We also know that Luke is a poor communicator. He plays his feelings really close to the chest. It’s what makes his and Lorelai’s relationship all the more special because it’s been moments like these when we get to see Luke show a little bit of vulnerability.

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That’s Luke!

 Luke loves Lorelai with all his heart right? He’s “all-in” right?

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But now he has a secret daughter and his response is to deliberately freeze Lorelai out of his relationship with April. Why? Because “if she meets you, she’ll like you more.”

 

Whaaaaaat?

I accept the fact that there might be some people out there who would think like this, but not the Luke Danes that I know. The Luke Danes I know would be able to understand that keeping his secret daughter and his future wife separate will only lead to emotional turmoil. Even Dean would be able to see that.

But this Luke Danes. Season 6 Luke Danes. He is clueless.

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Completely clueless

In this episode Luke decides to host April’s birthday party at the Diner. He soon proves to be inept at hosting a girl’s birthday party. Of course he is. The vibe was great until Luke terrifies the girls by telling them about how badly injured they will get if they venture into any of the non-party zones ( IE the Kitchen, and his apartment). Remember, Luke is a bad communicator, but then he acts shocked when no one is having any fun.

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Luke finally calls Lorelai to help him, and she heads over ASAP. Lorelai saves the day. How? She takes the girls somewhere where they will all enjoy themselves! Where? The beauty salon of course!!

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The party is saved. Luke even decides to let everyone sleep over. Lorelai stays as chaperone and Luke goes to bed.

Problem solved! Lorelai has met April. April still loves Luke. All is well right?

Nope! Because April’s mother, (whose name is Anna, btw) is pissed that April met Lorelai.

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Why? Let’s find out!

First, Anne is upset that now she has to tell all the other girls’ parents that their children spent the night with a woman who she has never even met! As-opposed to the girls spending the night with a man who she barely even knows.

Later on Lorelai goes to meet Anna, and Anna tells Lorelai that, “she can’t play fast and loose with the people in April’s life. What if April decided that she likes you? What if she becomes attached to you? And then one day you disappear. Being engaged is not married.”

And so, on the basis of those what-ifs Luke must choose between his estranged daughter and the love of his life. Since Lorelai and Christopher end up together in season 7 I think it’s pretty clear which choice Luke makes.

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Fuck this.